Strange Evolving World

The Shadow and Paul - Updates - Podcast

2010-04-21T18:16:00.001-07:00

http://www.box.net/shared/icqf840fbj

Updates

2010-04-06T00:18:00.001-07:00

Updates on my mom. It's an audiofile, so download at your leisure if you're still alive.

http://www.box.net/shared/mid660nrx7

Not Quite Ready

2010-04-01T22:42:00.000-07:00

Mostly what went on today was me cooking some fried chicken in Walmart's deli and fed on it, the portals have been becoming more and more apparent. Still no word as to exactly where my mother is, she hasn't been communciating and I can't seem to contact her for the life of me. I'd love to visit her and see how she and my brothers are doing, but can't seem to do so.

Still waiting word, I know she's still alive, I see her posting in her blog, but unfortunately she doesn't reply to my comments, nothing. Hopefully if she's not going to contact me she'll at least put the information up on her blog. Can't seem to call her, doesn't respond to my comments, etc. I'll find out somehow, until then, we're remaining stuck in Walmart. Besides, it gives Shadow's remaining friend to come up and meet us.

It's been verified that one of them has failed to survive, confirmed dead. Hopefully one way or another he also gets word that the other is still alive.

The Gifts

2010-03-31T20:30:00.000-07:00

Correction from before, my mother is not in Booger Holler, AR, thought that was where she was talking about when she mentioned the swamps, but she's somewhere in Florida. I'm still attempting to get a hold of her and my brothers Gary and Moriancumer to see exactly where they're located so I can haul ass over there. I know my mom and her gaters and apparently her neighbor before I even knew him. They're using their dogs, apparently a small dogs howl causes these zombie fucks pain and the gaters love zombie meat. So I know my mom is taking care of herself as well as my two brothers being alive and well too.

I've finally finished removing all the shitware from these computers and jailbroke and unlocked these iPhones as well. Will be packing these things off. I'm going to assume that the ZPCI will eventually clear the zombie horde off when we're ready to leave so I'm not entirely worried about that. Still waiting on my mom's coordinates so we can travel to her.

Still don't know if Shadow will be waiting behind for his friends or if he will be coming along with us, but that is entirely his choice.

Paul and the ZPCI

2010-03-30T16:52:00.000-07:00

Paul finally broke and answered the unanswered questions we were speculating before. The ZPCI do indeed stand for Zombie Pest Control Institute and they have ran into situations much like this before. They watch from an alternative dimension, just this case of zombie outbreak broke out too fast to be contained and broke out most likely before anyone realized it, and when it was finally realized, it was already too late. Apparently the American Institute of Aging Research was a subsection of the United States military and the infection is caused by a bacteria found in the world's rain forests creating zombified insects that continue on living for a while after death, liquefied organs, etc, the whole works.

While down in the store earlier this morning to cook breakfast at McDonalds, I saw one of these ZPCI goons vanishing into one of their whitish portals. At least I know now that it is indeed safe to cross through them, but they should be able to close them after they enter. It's almost like they're baiting me to enter one of them.

Paul states that they probably are encouraging me to enter by leaving them open like that, stating the portals usually close relatively quickly but they can set them to remain open longer. Though Paul has also notified me not to go through, it would be extremely bad and that they'd perform experiments on me or some stupid shit. I think I'll take his advice and not try it.

I've also got word from my mother, she found this blog. She and the rest of my family are with Lawanda in Booger Holler, Arkansas and they're surviving rather well it seems, must be all the gators out there. I know Kenny sure loves his pink and can only imagine Kenny going all out pink warrior on these zombies. It's a bit of a funny thought. Booger Holler, Arkansas will definitely be my personal next destination when we're ready to leave this Walmart. I'm going to get a few gifts for my good friend Kenny as well as for my mother and brothers. Grab a couple computers and some DVD's for Moriancumer of the Anime variety, a DVD Player and a laptop. For Gary, he'll get a few DVD's, a Laptop and a couple iPhones for the hell of it. Mom will get a laptop, an iPhone and everyone's getting clothes. Kenny's obviously got dibs on anything and everything pink. I think I'll get my mom a digital camera and a nice video camera to suit as well, I think she'd like that.

Shadows Friends, ZPCI and the Portals, WTF

2010-03-29T22:08:00.000-07:00

Granted that this Walmart superstore is still fortified well enough to keep the likes of the undead out of our hair, it's still annoying that we're still watching out for these clowns to get here and we're not even fucking sure if they're alive or dead.

My bet is that they're dead. I don't think they could make it, it just doesn't seem like they'd be the type that would be able to survive, then again, I could be surprised in the very near future. For Shadow's sake and peace of mind, I hope they're alright and that they contact him soon or show up, one of the two, I don't give a flying fuck what happens, just want some notification as to what to do.

Don't get me wrong, it's nice being surrounded by safer quarters where I can kinda take a bath, sit on a toilet, get free food, free clothes, plus more of my favorite form of weapon, the ball bat. Not sure why I really use those things when there are better weapons, I'm sure there are better blunt objects, but I just can't stand the thought of an axe or hatchet getting caught in the bone and me being stuck without a weapon I can immediately use, just bothers me. With a ball bat it's just a straight "CLINK" and it's out cold. Sure they reanimate, but who gives a fuck? Gives Paul more of moving target to have his orgasms, I mean fun with.

It seemed like before the only sure fire way to stay safe and alive was to remain on the road. Right now we're completely surrounded by the living dead and I even see what Shadow has seen, the whitish portal opening out of nowhere. Perhaps that's what's drawing them? Maybe these magical looking portals, these astranged things, maybe that's what's causing the dead to reanimate, maybe that's the source of the infection.

But if it's the source of the infection, then what about the guys in black with ZPCI stitched to either shoulder? It doesn't make sense. I'm here still trying to figure out what the hell the ZPCI are, why they're here, where they came from, what their purpose is and how they fit into everything.

I don't care about them much at this moment, but it seems they're able to freely move amongst the zombies without attack. They just do, if I were to go out there, I'd be eaten alive, fucking literally. What makes these others so special? Perhaps they're not even human. Now I'm just a hacker, not really anything special beyond that, I used to go within a disorganized, non centralized group of people involving free speech known as Anonymous, the so called "hackers on steroids" as we were commonly misrepresented as in most cases. I'm not even able to piece this all together, this is some strange and very creepy shit. Fuck the fact that if we wanted to leave this place right now we probably could, but it'd be incredibly unsafe, not sure if we could get out alive or not, but that's not the point, the point is, where the fuck are these bastards coming from and where are they going?

I've seen these whitish portals inside this store too, they're not just outside. When I eventually get the guts to do so, I'm seriously considering seeing if I can pop into one of those portals just to get some clue as to what's really going on. I have a theory though, about the portals and the ZPCI, and it's probably wild, but according to occums razor, it's the one most likely to be true. I think, and remember this is just theory, I think these these white looking portal things we see are really wormholes. They're most likely being used to travel between one place to another instantly. Where to is the question. There's all sorts of things that could be a possibility.

I've seen the Resident Evil movies, played the games, etc and RE Extinction really brings in an idea that there could be some government or company agency underground safe somewhere and using the portals to go back and forth to safety and checking things out. But that's too movie like, afterall, it was in a movie. Thinking back upon my days of searching for strange shit to read on Wikipedia, it does put me in mind of the Many Worlds Theory, Black Holes with the theoretical white holes situation in which one could teleport or utilize wormholes to travel through space, time and multiple dimensions.

I know, it sounds strange, but if you're reading this and still alive, you've either seen what Shadow and I've seen or you're not and think we're totally crazy, but 2 entirely different people seen the exact same thing, and I'm even seeing them inside our Wal-Mart safehouse. In theory by quantum mechanics, a black hole has a white hole on the other end of it, perhaps we're seeing the white hole side of these portals and are linking to another dimension. That's what I think, I think these are just wormholes traveling back and forth between dimensions. Not entirely impossible, just improbable and difficult to believe, let alone understand. I wouldn't believe it myself if I haven't seen these portals with my own eyes.

But thinking further for just a minute here, it wouldn't make sense for them to be walking through a black hole, that would kill people as it would compress you into a singularity. I also remember reading on Wikipedia before that a wormhole would be extremely unstable and unable to pass anyone nor anything through and would need stabilized by which they referred to as a negative energy. So it's not a black hole they'd be traveling through.

The whitish color is possibly due to distorted light from multiple locations showing at the other ends of said wormhole, however many ends it may have, let's assume it's only got two. That would explain the whitish color and the distortion of light around it. I think the ZPCI really are just aliens. Perhaps we're nothing more than an experiment, or they unleashed some sort of zombie apocalypse on us in order to cleanse the planet in order for them to be able to utilize our resources after we're all gone. Who knows, these ZPCI fuckers could very well have a cure for it all or have a way to exterminate them quickly and effectively, rather than just knocking them out.

Thought their weapons. They carried 2 things I'm able to recognize myself. One gun looked like an AK47 of some kind, the other was just a simple flame thrower fueled by a tank on their backs. Then there's this other one, it's hard to describe, it's not like anything I've ever seen before. Could be portal guns, but is that what a portal gun really looks like if it were taken from the game Portal and thrown into the real world? Nah, couldn't be that, it has to be something else, something I'm not seeing. It's a good possibility it's the weapon of choice by their alien race in order to control the zombie infection in this fucking apocalypse.

I'm dead serious though, I think they're aliens from another world or possibly even another dimension. Aliens from another dimension would seem like the likely possibility. Used up all their resources in their dimension or their world is getting over populated or some stupid shit like that and now they've come to our world in order to take over our resources and move into our neighborhoods once we're all dead.

Then again, I've seen these portals inside the building, I've yet to see a single ZPCI within our store. Not even a sight out the corner of my eye, not a one. If they truly are after destroying us, they could've very easily have killed us by now, especially in our sleep on the rooftops. Yet they haven't done so, not even so much as attempted at communicating. I don't know what to think about this new phenomenon. It's all too new and all to way out there fucking strange.

Paul thinks I'm just being crazy, though he too has seen these portals. He claims they're an undercover army that's been around for ages and utilize the portals to go back and forth in between dimensional planes in order to seek out survivors and assist them when they're in dire need and that they stay in the background and confines of an alternative dimension extremely close to the fabric of our own plane which allows them to see us, but we can't see them. It's extremely strange how he would know this and claim the ZPCI is just short for Zombie Pest Control Institute.

I know Paul is ex military, but why would he reveal something like that all of a sudden and not have informed us before that? First off, how the fuck would he know ZPCI stood for Zombie Pest Control Institute? Were zomies or life after death or something a military experiment all these ages and we just didn't know about it? Where there outbreaks before this latest outbreak that was initially just haulted and stopped during a critical time with a government coverup?

Paul won't give up any other information, he just sits up at the roof top picking zombie off one by one. It does seem strange that his shot is dead fucking accurate. Perhaps Shadow and I can get a hold of additional information out of Paul, he knows something and he's not telling us and we deserve to know what the fuck is going on. Considering the circumstances, I don't think it's appropriate to keep a secret like the ZPCI and what the fuck they are and what they're about from us when we're trying to survive in bullshit that they probably fucking started in the first god damned place.

I still want to see what's on the other end of one of these portals and still want to go through one, I just don't think I have the balls to do so. Probably couldn't be any worse than being here surrounded by zombies that want to destroy and eat us.

Ah, Morning Breakfast at Walmart

2010-03-29T06:28:00.000-07:00

I seem to have gotten up before anyone else so I sat up on the rooftop in my tent this chilly morning, curled up in my blanket waiting for Shadow or Paul to get up. Didn't have to wait long, Paul ended up having to wake up to take a piss. Kinda interesting, he went straight to the edge of the roof and started letting a golden rain shower the zombies like some strange and twisted erotic film involving urine, either that or one priest one nun or 2 girls 1 cup, either way it looks just like it and it's funnier than hell. Almost as funny as that ginger I saw last night pissing his pants running from zombies, but that's another story regardless of the fact that it made me laugh pretty fucking hard.

Paul noticed I was up after taking his morning piss break and asked me, "What's for breakfast?" Simply told him that we're going to have McDonalds, just like I had planned last night. We looked off the rooftop to the front doors, apparently still holding up. Thankfully even though they're learning, they're still pretty damn stupid, so it's gotta be safe. I'd still prefer someone with a gun of some sort. Paul woke Shadow up to have as reinforcement in case any zombies did manage to break into our little home.

We headed straight for McDonalds. I turned on that damnable oven and the grills, setting everything according to the training manual I read before. God I love photographic memories. Started up the fryers too, afterall, those chicken nuggets are fucking awesome.

Not going to go in much detail about it, who hasn't sucked the clown cock in life? Made ourselves those biscuits and mcgriddles I was talking about last night in my last post and promised I would make Nuggets and McChicken patties (since they're just a giant fucking chicken nugget). Then made sausages making a huge pile of these little guys, damn they're so delicious.

Biscuits were done, popped them fuckers out and popped in the pan of apple pies and saved a few back as just frozen pies, passing a pie each to Shadow and Paul to munch on. It was much like eating ice cream honestly, very tasty. In fact ... grabbed 3 more frozen pies for us to munch on. Then promptly, put the sausages and cheese in between the biscuits, wrapping each of them just like they did at McDonalds before all hell broke loose. Made us a really huge bag of these guys with all the biscuits and sausages used and then DING, yay, hot apple pies.

Set those fuckers to cool for a few minutes before using the white grill spatula to take them off the hot baking pan and into their little boxes. Just let that stay as is without the bag, just the box and left them all on the countertops along with the bag of sausage biscuits. Telling the other two to eat up and enjoy. Shadow promply obliged, as did Paul, tearing into it like gangbusters. I grabbed two biscuits for myself to munch on and surprisingly it still tasted pretty damn fresh. Gotta love the fast food industry and all their frozen shit.

The Shadow Arrives at Wally World in Greenville, MS

2010-03-28T22:48:00.000-07:00

I was sitting in my tent for a good portion of the day when suddenly I hear some familiar explosions and gunfire on the ground level. I rush out of my tent to see what the hell was going on and I see Shadow running up towards Walmart by himself. I signal Shadow to head towards the grocery side door and get acknowledgement then promptly rush down the escapes and disarm what few traps I have had set, especially the razor wire web on the front door.

Paul's caught wind of what's going on and got back up with his guns, not that we don't have enough it seems. He's up there picking these things off one by one, every shot literally counting and making an accurate hit, thank god someone can shoot in my party, I certainly as fuck can't shoot worth a god damned shit.

I waited there, watching through the blackout curtain waiting for Shadow to get close enough and pushed the doors open on the outer most side of the store to let him in and promptly closed it and started back setting up my spiderweb of razor wire to keep the pesky zombies out. As a hindsight, I noticed the shopping cart corral on the inside was shut, but wasn't trapped. I creeped inside by all the baskets and attempted to open it for the hell of testing, it wouldn't budge.

I dragged Shadow with me to the other side of the store for the same test, same, won't open. Thank fucking goodness as that was the worst miss sighting I've ever done which could've easily killed us all. The whole Walmart is zombie free, locked down, trapped and blacked out. The zombies can't get in.

Shadow and I stayed down below and called Paul's phone letting him know we're still downstairs. Needless to say Paul came down as well towards the deli. Turned on the fryers and waited until they beeped stating they were ready. Cut up some cheese, first obviously cutting the moldy outside and sliced us up some good cheese. I had myself some pepper jack cheese, Paul got Colby and Shadow contemplated for a while before deciding to get a chunk of each. In essence I just took the remainder of the pepperjack block.

I had Shadow run off to the frozen foods section to grab us some frozen chicken which it seems electricity is still running. He got back in time for the first fryer to state it's ready. Breaded up 4 bags of the frozen chicken which would've taken longer to cook had we not tossed those bitches in a microwave to defrost first. Defrosted one batch, cooked them while the next batch was defrosting and kept on breading and cooking chicken.

Paul and Shadow started chowing down on chicken, I kept on cooking more and more chicken until all 4 bags of chicken were used up. The next thing I sent Shadow for was frozen hamburger patties and even fried those fuckers up. Didn't really have a grill, but the fryer worked just fine. Damn I love chicken and burgers. Works pretty well though, it was all delicious and we have enough cooked to feast and feast on.

I know fully well there's a McDonalds on the other side of this Walmart, but who cares right now? Tomorrow morning I'll bake some of those delicious apple pies, biscuits, mcgriddles and whip us up a bitchen breakfast. Good think McDonalds freezes all their meat patties and most of their other food. The bread's pretty moldy as far as buns would be concerned at this moment, I checked earlier. Luckily enough though, the biscuits and mcgriddles and apple pies are all frozen and the electricity is still working just fucking fine, thankfully. We're not going to be able to eat this good after power no longer functions and we have no idea when that'll be. So need to eat good while we can. But that's all for tomorrow morning, will make us an bitchen fuckin breakfast and we shall enjoy ourselves.

Shadow is waiting for his buddies from Cave City, Arkansas still. Just where in the fuck are they? Don't matter though, they should get here eventually provided they're still alive. I haven't seen any additional posts on the other guy's blog so I don't even know if he is alive or just can't make it online or what. Makes it difficult to know if someone's alive or dead really as that seems to be our only communication with people is our blogs, but it does let others know our story. We'll hold up here at Wal-Mart for a little while. There's enough supplies here.

I ended up also heading over to the bathrooms to take myself another sink bath, rubbing my pits, crotch, etc with paper towels and drying off with the same medium, then just walked out into the story naked as a stork. Headed right to the clothing section and grabbed some clean undies, socks, a new pair of very comfy steel toed boots, water proof too. Got a nice sturdy pair of pants, new shirt and my favorite, a nice black and very sleek trench coat. Ohhhh fuck yeah, trench coats.

My next stop was also the sporting goods section, my hands needed new aluminum baseball bats. Can't hurt to replace them every once in a while. I know these things will get bent after a while. Thankfully I haven't had to use my bats very often to begin with. God I love guns and explosives, work really well when placed in the hands of Paul and Shadow.

Then walked to beauty supplies and cleaned my face with some products, some combs for the three of us and slicked my hair back with some rubbing alcohol. My final stop was shaving cream and razors, same section. Shaved right there, cleaning my razor with even more rubbing alcohol. Thank god because I was pretty stubby on the chin. Paul however sports a beard all the time, so no worries there, he's not shaving. Shadow isn't really old enough, only like 16 or some shit. Don't know exactly, don't care either.

We're still on the ground level at the moment, chowing down on chicken, cheese and burger patties. We'll be asleep on the roof again.

I asked Shadow if he noticed anything strange earlier, but stated to nevermind it. I think it's best if I don't mention it. Even though I know he saw some portal like thing outside on his way here from reading his blog, not sure if it's something to bring up. Whitish portal... Wonder how that's how these ZPCI folks travel back and forth. Time portal or travel portal to another location far away and free from infection? Don't know. Would love to get into one of them and see what it's like. Would love that.

Couldn't Sleep

2010-03-28T13:31:00.000-07:00

I was having difficulty getting to sleep last night. I still had that ZPCI thing on my mind. What namely disturbed me was the fact that they showed up out of plain nowhere and vanished just as quickly. I scoured the internet for a few hours last night looking for the keyword ZPCI to see if I could find any information on the net about them, but unfortunately nothing turned up.

I did doze off a few times last night, but I kept having dreams about these ZPCI folks, it's really disturbing. I think I'm probably just going insane or I just hallucinated last night, afterall, how else could I explain living, breathing people showing up out of nowhere and vanishing out of sight within a blink of an eye?

Paul and I have decided to hold ourselves up here at the Wal-Mart here. The front doors of all other entrances, including the truck entrances in the back have been sealed off and trapped. Taking razor wire and making a web in front of the doors, blacking out all windows and doors this way including a tarp over them to prevent us from being seen and giving us an extra layer of protection should we feel the need to go back down to grab more supplies.

The duct work won't hold our weight, but at least we can roam the store semi freely. Any zombies get in, we knock them out with a bullet or ball bat, drag them to the rooftop and toss them over the ledge outside to put them back in their place. This has only happened once and every time we have planned to fortefy a little more with stuff from around Walmart here.

We're primarily waiting here because it has a constant supply of everything we need, plus our gasoline, ammo cases, food stuffs, medicines, etc are all up here on the roof top with us, we wouldn't dare dream of leaving any of it downstairs since we're fully aware of the zombies learning. Since they've been picking up weapons, kinda speaking and all that shit, I don't want one of them to learn the miracle of fire and suddenly set us up as a BBQ.

I'm going to comment on Shadow's blog, let him know we're still here. He and his bitch are welcome to come up, just if she tries any funny business, she'll be zombie chow, afterall, zombies ask for it by name.

MS Still

2010-03-27T22:44:00.000-07:00

We're still in Mississippi, but it's not an unfortunate thing either. Paul and I had left The Shadow off at the gas station we stopped at previously to refill, I think he wanted to go back to the blood belching vaginal infection we left stranded back there, but that's fine. Yup, just read his blog, he's indeed still with the dumb bitch and horded up. Though if she's as much as a nymph as he thinks she is, he should probably let her ride on his cock, but that's another story.

While here in MS, Paul and I horded ourselves up into another Walmart, yet again, but we saw something extremely strange. Don't know what to think of it. We've searched this location inwards and outwards and found absolutely and positively no living human life around this Walmart location, but lo and behold suddenly 5 people with really big guns and flame throwers show up in all black uniforms with ZPCI etched onto their upper arm sleeves.

It's scary because they appeared out of nowhere. The zombies already got knocked out courtesy of Paul and a baseball bat in my hands and were still knocked out when these .. I think they're just called ZPCI, just they were still out cold when these fuckers showed up. Where the sam fuck did these sons of bitches come from?

I was following their movements from the rooftop of Walmart, Paul and I already got a couple new sleeping bags, some pillows and our tents set up just fine, but this intrigued me. Where the fuck did they come from? And namely, where the hell did they go. They rushed around the corner of Walmart as if they knew we were watching them and just like that, they were gone.

I'm going to get some sleep, this is fucking with my head, but the zombies can't make their way up here. We've boarded up and closed the entrance to the rooftops. What the hell is ZPCI? Where did they come from? And namely, where did they go? I think big brother might actually be watching us.

Finally in Mississippi

2010-03-26T15:56:00.000-07:00

We're currently in Mississippi. It was my turn to drive from the military base onward. Something that surprises me actually. All the military personnel and people trained to use live rounds and kick ass and take names, yet we see plenty of zombies around military bases wearing military gear. Perhaps the US military forces didn't have what it took. Either that or the majority of folks in the military are just plain retards that don't have a lick of fucking sense in their heads, either way, doesn't matter.

I couldn't find my mother in Florida, though I'm glad I didn't see her as one of the living dead. I don't think my heart could've handled that, I really don't think I could've.

Paul and Shadow got out of the truck and I slipped into the driver's seat when we reached a military base. It's a bit on the funny side to me really. It seems the only real way to be able to survive in the zombie apocalypse is to keep on the road, keep moving, never to stay in a single place else you become amongst the numbered ranks of the dead that walk.

Paul and Shadow came out with an ammo case full of grenades, though it doesn't seem they were able to find any rocket launchers. I was hoping they would, that would've been neat, then again the only one that would really know how to use one of those properly would be Paul himself, but just the same, we all know how much Paul loves these explosives and guns and I just enjoy beating the fuck out of them.

Every zombie I hit with a ball bat I name as someone that's either attempted at screwing me over in life or someone I just plain flat didn't like. It makes it very stress relieving.

Before the zombie apocalypse I couldn't get a job, jobs were scarce with a very high unemployment rate in the United States and President Obama at the time didn't seem to know how the fuck to get us out (which would've been to have these multi billion and multi trillion dollar corporations to start spending money or change the currency to make their money worthless, but that's another story and no longer relevant in today's world). When I did have a job, I wouldn't be able to keep it, my attitude issues would either cause me to lose the job or I would simply quit. I didn't enjoy it in the slightest and it always disturbed me, like I'd get nowhere fast in life and I also really hated the fact that working as a PC Technician in computer repair stores would pay me minimum wage for a skilled labor job. Geek Squad wouldn't hire me because they claim Linux is a hacker tool and they don't support hacker tools. The idiots. Their website required internet explorer from Microsoft or you couldn't apply for work. Fuck them, fuck them fuck them fuck them fuck them fuck them fuck them!!!!

It's great with the zombie apocalypse now though. My only real job is survival and killing zombies. All the free shit I want, I don't have to worry about bills anymore. It's all about surviving and finding my next sets of meals and preparing hot foods when we run into a place that still has electricity due to either the power grid still working or generators that can be cranked on. The fresh water supply still seems to be running, though that's only used to take spit baths. Taking a rag and running it under the sink and using some hand soap to wash our crotches, underarms, face and hair.

We stray away from public restrooms most of the time and really only go in one at a time when we want to clean ourselves. Clean clothes however is a completely different story. We just raid a clothing store or a Wal-Mart and simply get naked and throw on some clean and brand new clothes from the racks, leaving our dirty shit on the ground practically where ever. Why bother with the trash cans? This isn't civilized society anymore. Plus it's great because we can be a royal dick and not have to worry about the consequences. In most cases it also seems the nerds of society and those at the bottom rung of society are the ones who are the Alpha Males.

We passed by a car broken down with what looked like a mother and her small child, probably 5 or 6 years of age locked in their vehicle. The hood was shut but the car was still smoking. As we were in their line of sight, the mother got out of the car and shut the door behind her promptly and started to wave at us. We weren't stopping. Unless it's a large group of people, we're not stopping for folks on the side of the fucking road. Too many cases in which someone will attempt at tricking us just to take our shit. We're not about to let that happen, not a prayer's chance in hell. Paul said after we passed her that she fell to her knees and started crying in her hands. Not my problem, not my concern. She should've played the situation a little better and not have been fucked up. We have all the supplies we need if we were to break down, blown tire, etc and enough to keep our truck maintained. That dumb cunt could've as well. But nah, she was probably thinking only of getting out and driving. I bet she just ran out of gas and needed a tank refill, but again, not my problem. She should've thought about getting gas cans and gasoline filled in them for just that kind of emergency, but she didn't. Women.

Then there's one more instance of another survivor, but this was in what I think was Greenville, Mississippi, we're still in the town I think unless we already crossed the city limits and I just didn't notice. One doesn't seem to care much about where they're at too much when there's not really anywhere but everywhere to go and no need to confine oneself to city and state limitations.

We saw one guy though in Greenville, MS that was standing on a hill top, shotgun in hand. Very brave looking ginger, probably in his twenties as far as age was concerned. The zombie horde nearby was running after his red haired ass at a rather surprising pace and he just stood there with his shotgun. He was either brave or gave up on life and was waiting for his approaching death by zombie, in either case, I stopped the truck and pointed to Paul and Shadow to check out that red headed fuck up there.

The ginger stood up there, bravely, kept standing, not even firing a shot, but shotgun ready and aimed, the horde getting closer and closer to him. Then at a moments notice, the ginger turned high tail practically leaving a trail of wet shit in his path. It's like he expected the zombies to slip on his runny shit and break their necks. My god it was fucking hilarious to watch. The ginger however was running a completely different direction and since neither of us know these roads very well, didn't know exactly how to get to where he was running towards to see if we could possibly save him. Afterall, how could we not trust someone like that? He had a gun, he seems trustworthy... and intelligent enough to know to have a gun instead of a fucking blood belching vagina.

I'm extremely glad we don't have any fucking women in our party. Sure it would be great to do our manly duties and repopulate the Earth with people, but honestly after seeing how several women acted during the apocalypse and lack of preparation (even amongst the survivors barely scraping by), I'd rather take my chances with just having sex with a guy or just stroking my cock off myself until I bust my seed. I don't really care to hear the nagging either. Before the apocalypse most of the women I know would just fucking nag nag nag, and they nag so persistently that I'd be afraid that'd be nagging after the zombie apocalypse too forcing me to use them as zombie chow, which zombies ask for by name.

Not sure really what to do is Mississippi, but one thing's for sure, it's been great traveling. We had to stop off at another gas station to refill the truck and gas cans, which was a lot easier and more comfy to do with Paul and Shadow both picking zombies off. It's like those two are playing a game with each other. I bet they'd probably call it "Who's the better killer". It's either that or they just really love an unlimited supply of moving targets.

Mommy!

2010-03-25T22:09:00.000-07:00

I know I'm quite the momma's boy, but I love my mother to death, I can't help it. The whole reason I dragged our asses to Jacksonville, Florida was to find my mother. We drove to her house, but unfortunately her windows were broken and front door was wide open as well. Things don't look good. I don't think my mother is alive anymore. She's probably out amongst the living dead now. Poor mom.

How dare these butt fuckers fuck with my mother! HOW FUCKING DARE THEY FUCK WITH MY GOD DAMNED MOTHER! I cannot take this, I will not accept it, my mom has to be alive somewhere, she's too much of a strong cookie to not survive. But I swear to god if I see my mother as a zombie, I'm going to tally flip the fuck out and kill everything in sight, it will not be a good day to be the living dead if they did this cuz I will fuck them up. This limp wrist here. It can do a nice little magic trick and turn into a fucking fist. I will beat these cock suckers with my bare fucking hands. Imma kill these mother fuckers. See I got this butchers knife and I'll knock these fuckers out and castrate these mother fuckers and force feed them their dead dicks! TRY EATING WHEN YOUR CHOKING ON YOUR OWN COCK THOSE FUDGE PACKING MOTHER FUCKING, DICK EATING, FART SNIFFING, QUEER, GIANT TITTY CANCER INFESTED FUCKING ASS MUNCHERS!

We'll leave Florida, our next stop will end up being somewhere in Mississippi. Don't know really if Shadow will continue traveling alongside with us or if he'll break off onto his own at any time, but that's entirely his decision.

Damn this sucks. Mom, where are you? I miss you. I love you. Please mom, be ok, be alive, be well.

Driving but My Current Thoughts

2010-03-25T17:12:00.000-07:00

Bathroom Break Time

2010-03-25T15:45:00.000-07:00

I realized that for those who are still survivors horded somewhere in a stronghold, you're obviously not quite ready to really live in the outside with the outbreak of the zombie fiends of fucking death and hell, which means you have no idea how we really use the restroom. I never really thought about it, but you know we have to piss and bomb for bugs too just like everyone else. We're real living people with real needs, including bodily waste disposal.

When we're on the road and there's no restroom in sight, we generally just whip our cocks out and just piss out the moving vehicle. Typically speaking that is. We do stop from time to time, especially when we have hardly any zombies or no zombies nearby so we can step outside the truck and take a piss.

But what about taking a shit you ask? This is common, we do carry toilet paper on us. We either squat somewhere and shit, wipe our asses and leave our waste and used toilet paper on the ground. We stray away from restrooms entirely, they're seen as death traps. Once you're in the restroom, even if you lock the door, you don't know what's on the outside.

If you've got to take a piss or crap somewhere, do so outside. It may seem embarrassing that others can see you go to the bathroom, but at least these others can protect you while you're wiping your ass with shit paper or while you're vulnerable with your cock out.

Strange Evolving World: McDonalds Adventures 4 U!

2010-03-25T05:02:00.000-07:00

The Shadow's Blog

McDonalds Adventures 4 U!

2010-03-25T00:19:00.000-07:00

No no, this is nothing involving the autosurf program called Adventures4U, not by a long shot seeing as how nobody is alive that gives a living shit really about money at this particular moment in time, but who gives a fuck about these things anyway right? HA! RIO auto surf programs sucked in life and they suck in the afterlife. So who cares.

Shadow, myself and Paul arrived to McDonalds in Batesville, Arkansas courtesy of the directions of Shadow of course. With the utilization of some of the greatest grenade explosions in the history of mankind, Paul and Shadow helped clear out the horde of zombies around McDonalds. These ones don't seem to be knowledgable, but one thing's for certain, they've learned to open doors, even though they don't seem to be able to communicate worth shit still. Seems the only thing they're capable of saying are things that are closely entwined in their lives, like sex with their sisters or religion, even though they don't give a fuck about their religion apparently being undead.

Paul and Shadow went to obtain even more supplies to fill the truck with. Pharmaceuticals, bandage stuff and apparently something involving housewares or hardware or something, I didn't quite catch it as I was working on figuring out the McDonald's fryers. They didn't have the McRibbs unfortunately ... damnit. I know Paul wanted them and I wanted to swipe one myself, but it's all cool.

It took the fryers a decent bit to heat up, but thankfully I had the baseball bats with me and finally, fucking sweet assed finally, I got the chance to use them. I beat the living fuck out of a few zombies that managed to make their way into McDonalds. Just for safety purposes, I took the liberty of breaking their thighs, arms, neck, skull, and ribs, quite literally beating them into a bloody pulp and making for god damn sure they're crippled to enable me to focus a bit more on cooking and prepping food stuffs.

There was a bun heater that needed turned on, this was turned on while the fryers were heating up and raided the cooling cabinets underneath the sandwhich boards to pick up some wilted lettuce and rehydrated fresh onion, periodically having to stop and beat the living fuck out of a zombie or two here and there. Namely, when one reanimated which I kept close eye on while working on the McChickens.

Apparently it's the clear bag of chicken that they used for the McChickens. I found the manual or orientation guide or whatever the fuck it's called for how long the McChickens are supposed to be cooked for and pressed the appropriate button after dropping the chickens into the fryers. Then dropped but buns into the bun toaster to toast a whole bag of buns.

From there I prepped the McChickens with some Mayo which was surprisingly to me that it's still kinda fresh. Made up several bags for of it, large bags that is.

Paul and Shadow got back in time to help me carry the McChickens, but they decided to sit down and eat, Paul periodically busting a cap in someone's ass.. well, some zombies ass, rather what's left of it's ass after the first time around. We sat down and ate, then got back into our huge assed truck.

It seems Shadow has taken a liking to Pauls shit pot load of ammunition and gun supply, let alone the explosives. It seems Shadow found sex toys. I have to stop and wonder though. Every time Paul squeezes the trigger of one of his guns, does he have an orgasm? It sure fucking seems like it. Makes sense though in a twisted sort of way if you stop and look at it. A bullet is a mini explosion and an orgasm is often referred to as an explosion or explosive feeling by most men (what used to be men).

I swear if I ever become a zombie, I'd be checking my pants the entire time. I want to make sure my balls and dick aren't rotting off my body, but that's fine, so long as my goods stay in their place. Then again there are some people I wouldn't even fuck with a zombiefied dick either, and that's with a dead dick mind you. Ugh, how in the hell do some people manage to even get laid? Oh yeah, that's right, booze and date rape drugs AKA Aqua Dots.

We have enough McChickens for a little bit. We each ate about 3 each, Paul actually ate about 4. I'm thinking of bringing up Jacksonville, Florida. I'd love to see if I can find my mother and if she's alive still. I hope she's still alive. I don't know if I could keep myself any more sane than I already am. Seriously, I know I'm pretty fucking evil but who gives a fuck? If they do give a fuck I'll just let them get eaten.

Where the Fuck Is a McDonalds!?

2010-03-24T20:47:00.000-07:00

Shadow has tested fire against his old buddy Ash after we had lied our asses off about how the bastard really died. Yeah, we just found him wondering around, yeah, uh huh, he was dumb, probably should have said he was having sex with one of the zombies in a hot gay 3 way, and he was the bitch, but let's leave it at that.

Fire apparently does kill off the flesh of the zombies and deanimate them according to Shadows report. I decided to see this for myself so I went to see the zombiefied Ash myself. With a little help with some gasoline, a match, a severed hand of Ash and a metal mixing bowl I found in the Church's kitchen. I placed the zombie hand, which was still animated and attempting to get out of the bowl. Mixed in one part gasoline, one part zombie hand and one part match and created a delicious zombie hand sufle! Within a short minute, the hand not only cooked damn well, but also stopped movie. The zombie hand stopped burning after a while, wasn't much gas afterall, and waited for the hand. Ash screaming and cussing at me. Something about a McChicken or some shit I don't know, I don't speak stupid hick.

I walked to Ash and knelt down to him to ask him what exactly it feels like to be a zombie. Again I didn't understand a fucking thing he said, sounded something along the lines of "ooo ahhhh oooo ahhhh sex with my sister oooo Jesus" or some stupid shit like that. Hell I can never understand what the fuck these idiots are saying, it's all gibberish to me. I'm not even sure they're speaking English. I mean it sounds like English but it's not... I guess.

Shadow had asked me where we were going next and I simply asked where the fucking closest McDonalds is. He informed me it was in Batesville and god damnit we're headed to fucking Batesville. I've got to get me a fucking McChicken Sandwhich, I know their shit is frozen. We can break into the McDonalds, cook that Chicken McShitwhich, grab some BBQ sauce because I'll definitely need it. I want to take that giant chicken nugget and dip that son of a bitch in some sauce damnit!

We were ready to go to McDonalds. Paul and I headed towards the door, Paul wanted a McRibb as it is, so FUCK YEAH! 2 against ... lets see here, 1 ... 2 ... 3 aw fuck it. Essentially Paul, Myself and Shadow just opened the doors, Paul and Shadow with guns ablazing and sword swinging like a mother fucker. I failed to mention to anyone I had loosened the ropes on Ash's zombie hand that kept him restrained to his body, in hopes really that he'll loosen it the rest of the way himself and get out and get some help from his zombie buddies outside rushing in to kill and eat the rest of the church survivors to see if they can get Jesus to help them this time.

Damn, that sure is a waste of Twinkies.

Zombie Job Interview

2010-03-24T19:30:00.000-07:00

The Shadow had asked Paul if he would be able to help capture one of the living dead. This is going to be hilarious. Of course I'm going with him, I wouldn't miss this for the world. Ash, one of The Shadow's party within the confines of this god damned church full of idiots lacking Kindergarten education, he's just coming with us, let's leave it at that. I don't care if he's voluntary or not, one way or another, I need bait and I'm not playing bait myself.

With a little assistance of one of my dirty socks and just a tiny bit of rope to tie Ash's hands and feet once we're outside the view of the others, we're ready to go with our fishing bait. God I love fishing. Not that we're capturing an already a zombie zombie, no, it's like playing with Play Doh. I get great joy in knowing I helped someone reach eternal life. Afterall, the only worthwhile eternal life as an after life is when you're actually in the after life, just reanimated, am I right?

We didn't go outside ourselves, we just popped the dumbass's ... ass outside still tied up. We have enough rope leeway in order drag him back inside and Paul has enough ammo in his sex toys to get rid of any zombie that may come through the door when we drag the corpse back inside. Thus we did.

We brought in the body that used to be Ash back inside the building, Paul only had to only shoot a few zombies. Lo and behold, the corpse of Ash reanimated rather quickly. We know for certain that once you're dead from being bitten, you reanimate within a few minutes, didn't take long at all. He also seemed intelligent enough to speak. Great, we now have our zombie. We asked if he was fine, and he muttered something incoherent. I think he said something along the lines of that he wanted a cheeseburger, or he was cussing us out and pissed that we used him as bait, one way or another, it's certain that I think I want a chicken sandwhich. Where the hell can I find a McDonalds around this dump dive.... FUCK!

We bring forth the new zombiefied Ash to Shadow as he's already bound in rope pretty damn well. Needless to say I removed my dirty sock from his mouth before bringing him out. We now have the opportunity to interview said zombie for his job interview of getting his ass kicked. Paul will at least have something for target practice. Damn I need a McChicken Sandwhich.

Damn, Arkansas At Last!

2010-03-24T16:21:00.000-07:00

Throughout our trip to Cave City, Arkansas to meet with The Shadow and any other survivors that may be with him, we had to stop short of coming close to Houston, Texas. We stopped in Fort Worth, Texas. Paul apparently had a blast, he got to play target practice again. There were only a few zombies, 5 to be precise. Paul unrolled his window of the driver side seat and woke me up, I had apparently passed the fuck out on the trip. I got up and was told to get out and pump gas. My first thought was "FUCK!" but I did so. I got out groggily, and got into the back of the truck bed.

It's apparent the god damned dead are starting to gain some form of intelligence, one of the pompous fucks tried to climb into the back of the truck before receiving a pellet to the head, courtesy of Paul's play practice. I grabbed the pump for premium gasoline and filled the truck first. Then, leaving the gas pump's head within the bed of the truck, I unscrewed all the caps on the gas cans and filled those damn things up as well. I have no earthly clue how long I've been pumping, gas, but it was long enough for 2 of the zombies to reanimate themselves, which of course Paul was more than happy to aim his mental crosshairs at.

The gas was finished being pumped in the truck and all the cans. Paul moved over to the passenger seat which was my queue to drive this time around. Normally I wouldn't want to drive because most of the other fuckers on the streets are idiots and would need to retake their written test to get their fucking license revoked, but I degress because this situation is no longer needed as everyones dead and now here for the mere sport of Paul's weaponry. I haven't had to use my ballbats yet, kinda fun really.

Still typing this all on the iPhone and I'm learning I'm getting quite fast at it. Right now we're in Cave City, Arkansas so I can safely type while The Shadow and the rest of the survivors help fortefy the stronghold of the church. There was one more stop in Fort Worth, Texas worth mentioning. Paul wanted to stop and collect toys.

Using Paul's direction, I drive us to a military base there where Paul got his ass out of the truck, practically falling 10 feet considering how tall this god damned truck is, and ran into a specific building he had me drive us towards. There weren't any undead there, which was shocking, at least not to my knowledge at first. I heard some gunshots, high power rifles and pistols, not the pellet guns. I have no idea if Paul was testing weapons or taking out zombies but one way or the other, I'm sure Paul was having a damn good fucking time. It's great, it's like the only thing that makes him happy, a never ending supply of moving targets.

Paul did come back just fine, though making several trips popping ammo case after ammo case into the back of the truck and a couple within the truck, one on the passenger side floorboard and one in back end of the cab where I'd assume children would ride. It's like a limo for stupid hicks, which is saddening considering I'm surrounded by these fuckers right now. Idiots, not just the zombies. Honestly I think the stupid zombies I originally noticed in Arizona where smarter than these dumb fucks here in this church. They're all praying to "God" and "Jesus Christ" thinking those to fictional fairy tale characters are going save them. I'm personally waiting on the Flying Spaghetti Monster to save us. Hell, it makes more fucking sense to me.

Paul's got his toys though, I have no fucking idea what in the sam hell these guns are called but I don't care, they're awesome. This one pistol which I think is a magnum blows heads up real good. I mean, damn. One load, one shot, mission accomplish. Those brains go splatter splat splat plop! It was beautiful seeing a brick wall painted with hair, bits of skull and flesh, brains and blood. I found it to be pretty fucking awesome. There's no amount of awesome to describe it. Paul is god...

During our trip towards Cave City, Arkansas, Paul had to empty 2 of the gas cans to refill the truck while we were on the road, pretty interesting getting out of the truck through that sliding glass thing in he back side of the truck and crawling through it's window to get back there. It's pretty hard to fill a truck with gas from gas cans when you're going close to 100 miles per hour and the speed bumps umm I mean zombies, at least I'd assume it would be. Paul did it like it was nothing.

We arrived in Cave City and headed towards the location which The Shadow told us he would be. Though we saw what looked like someone being attacked by zombies through a broken window of a car. Looks like this idiot dumbass didn't know to highjack a taller vehicle and lock the doors of said tall vehicle. What a dumbass. Then again I can see where he gets said intelligence or lack thereof being in this church with the survivors here for just a few minutes, it makes me want to turn into a zombie just to eat them to get them to shut the fuck up already.

Paul squeezed himself through the back window glass and braced himself. I just drove slowly, going about 20 MPH and going around the parking lot and blasting the hell out of zombies. Personally, I went for the grenade, GOD that was fucking awesome. I never new grenades where like candy, I could play with these things all day. Dear god no wonder why Paul loves his guns, that was fun as hell watching them fuckers blow up into a bazillion little pieces. Lets see you reanimate now butt fucker!

Next thing we know after all said commotion was some kid, yes, kid pop out of the grocery store wearing a red cloak. The person getting attacked jumped onto the back and yelled out to not shoot him, he's alive and climbed into the truck. We pulled towards the front and picked up the kid in the red cloak who hopped into the passenger seat with me and had us drive to the church which was basically right across the fucking street. Convenient.

We head to the church and park. The kid in the read cloak, apparently adorned in saw blades, tells us to grab our weapons and supplies and bring them into the church. We asked why only for us to realize from his response that the zombies are learning, they're grabbing weapons and may utilize gas and fire to burn the building down and bust through the stronghold. Paul and the kid using their guns and ... fucking saw blades and some ninja sword shit, they protected it while myself and the other dipshit idiot from the car of duress taking all the shit into the church, as well as the gas cans.

Once all is inside, we gather ourselves and fortify the doors. The kid in the read cloak introduces himself as The Shadow. Surprises the living hell out of me. A kid contacted us? A fucking kid? Seems to be a good fighter with throwing weapons and the sword, don't know if he could possibly compete with Paul but ok, why not, sure. FUCK IT! Almost immediately, our supply of twinkies and hostess cupcakes started to dwindle as the other survivors started chowing down on our grub.

The next thing that I notice are these dumbshits start praising "God" and thanking "Jesus Christ" for the food that was just brought to them. God and Jesus my ass, it was my effort mixed with Paul's infinity target practice fetish that brought the food, not these fictional fairy tail fuckers. These guys are getting on my last fucking nerve, half temped to just blow the doors down, get in the truck and leave them all except the kid in the red cloak to die for the soul purpose of being Zombie Chow, zombies ask for it by name.

Strange Evolving World: Fuck it, Detour!

2010-03-24T16:07:00.000-07:00

The Shadow in Cave City, Arkansas

Fuck it, Detour!

2010-03-23T23:41:00.000-07:00

Paul had the brilliant plan and idea. Let's say fuck it and go to Arkansas, more specifically check out the areas around Little Rock, the suburban areas of the city in hopes of staying completely away from major cities. It's a great idea in my opinion considering major cities house a shit pot load more people in cities than in the smaller towns. We will need to stop off at a military base or two when we pass them, so we're going to pass through Houston, Texas in attempts to locate the military bases to obtain Paul's most beloved and favorite toys. I swear it's like a sexual fetish for him, but hey, to eat his own, I'm not coming between an old fart and his guns.

I was looking at a map from Google Maps to find a great location in Arkansas based on population size assuming the people are living still, which I most certainly hope they're not... I'd get to see Paul use some cool shit for target practice. We picked up one location in mind. It's a strong Christian community called Cave City, it's near Batesville, AR. Anyone in Cave City still alive?

NOTE: Shortly after this post, a guy referring to himself as The Shadow has messaged me. He's from Cave City, Arkansas. We'll definitely be seeing him.

Onwards Still to Texas

2010-03-23T20:37:00.000-07:00

We're still on our way to Houston, Texas and we ran into an interesting sign. Apparently the attack hasn't completely taken over the United States yet, though we know it started in Mesa, Arizona. Nobody knows still what's caused the outbreak of zombie assholes, but I've got my suspicions that it definitely isn't God like so many people are saying... according to the signs they're holding "This Is The End, Repent" and all that bullshit. I took a picture with my iPhone regarding the most interesting zombie sign I've seen yet by the United States Roadway Department.

We've also decided a little earlier this morning that our best bet for survival and places to sleep would be within the confines of the truck. We just lock the doors and the zombies don't seem to be able to really do anything but beat on the door, they don't seem to reach for the window at all, much less able to. We're currently parked right now and have 7 of the undead around us. Paul told me something funny. Target practice. So we drove down the road a few dozen yards and let them start traveling back towards us. We rolled our windows down halfway and passed me a one of his pellet guns from Walmart and started shooting at them. My aim relatively sucks, but Paul, god damn is he ever fucking dead on target.

Paul wants to raid a military base for real guns and ammo. I personally want to see some explosions, I think that'd be awesome as hell! I'm looking forward to see what Paul can do. I would've personally strayed away from guns since I don't know how to find ammo like gangbusters, but Paul, he's ex-military, he should be able to go Rambo. So if all goes well, this should be extremely interesting.

Escape from the Walmart Roof Top

2010-03-22T07:21:00.000-07:00

It's apparent to me now that Paul had grabbed a couple pellet guns and ammo from the kiddy guns. I wasn't expecting them to work well to begin with, but they were. Paul's an ex military police office who was stationed in Germany for 6 years. He's stated he wants to go a few military bases to pick up some awesome weaponry.

I watched Paul with amazement as he was able to pick these zombies off one by one by one and kept going at it. He's like a machine. Obviously though, the zombies are only knocked out and are capable of getting back up, how long they're knocked out, we have no clue. Last we saw they get knocked out between 2 to 4 hours total.

He managed to buy us enough time to grab an extra gallon of milk, more ammunition for his pellet guns, more snack cakes and his personal favorite, 50 pound sledge hammer, and I have no earthly idea why he picked up anti-freeze. I guess I'll find out later.

I let him drive this time around considering he got us out alive without infection. Our next stop is in Texas before we head our way up to Canada. Let's face it, we both heard that Canadian grass is pretty awesome, and I intend to have something to smoke on.

.... There is a god, and his name is Paul.

The horde of zombies continues

2010-03-20T20:15:00.000-07:00

Paul and I, Mark Holinstein, are still here on the Walmart rooftop. There's even more undead now than there were earlier. We've already drank the whole gallon of milk and finished off the chicken today. Not sure what we're going to do today considering all the rest of the supplies we obtained are in the truck on ground level, including the bulk of the food.

We're going to need to get off the rooftop sometime. We can't stay up here forever, we don't have enough food and water to survive too much longer.

The CB Radio's we obtained are up here with us and we've been calling out for help if there's anyone out there, so far we've got nothing but static, nobody seems to be alive and out there to help. Hope we can get out of this alive.

2010-03-20T12:39:00.000-07:00

Oh Shit, No Escape in Sight

It seems as though sleeping on the Walmart rooftop was a horrible idea as opposed to being on the road and sleeping in the big ass truck we took from Prescott, AZ. We got up way the hell early up in the morning to the sounds of shuffling all around the building, coming from the ground level of course.

We looked over the rooftop ledge to find ourself surrounded by the undead zombie freaks. There doesn't seem to be any possibility of us getting out alive. I'm afraid for the my life, for Paul's life. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to die.

The doors at Walmart are unfortunately easy to open just by pushing them open, especially since we didn't lock the damn doors. 20 20 hindsight sucks ass! What the fuck is going to happen with us? Are we going to die? Will we survive? How the hell do we get out of this fucking mess?

There is no god. God, Jesus Christ, Allah, Zues, whatever they're all fake. IF they were real, we wouldn't have to deal with shit like this in our lives. As for an escape plan.... I don't think we really can get out of this alive. I'm pretty sure we're going to die.

Globe, Arizona - We've Arrived!

2010-03-19T20:34:00.000-07:00

It appears the undead have really spread themselves out quite a bit over the course of the last few days. As we were driving through the vastness desert region of Arizona, we've ran into and ran over quite a few of these zombie bastards. It's like they travel to find themselves more of a food source.

We arrived in Globe, Arizona and searched throughout the entire town, which doesn't take long considering how small it is, looking for any and all survivors. We've seen absolutely no sign of anyone still alive. The entire town seemed relatively dead, no pun intended there.

It was relatively easy to raid the Wal-Mart pharmacy and some food supplies. Paul and I grabbed an aluminum basedbat eatch and a duffle bag from Wally World, filled the backpacks with some food stuffs, especially a few things like zebra cakes, twinkies and things like that.

The foods at the Deli at wally world weren't really all that fresh, which sucked, I wanted my fucking potato salad and it was bad. Those assholes.

We sat down, ate some yogurt, drank some chocolate milk and loaded our truck up with an additional gallon of milk to drink. Then as an afterthought, we headed to the deli and turned the friers on and let the oil heat up and cooked ourselves up some chicken. It apparently takes about 15 minutes for the chicken to cook in those things, but it was still worth it and fucking good.

Packed some extra chicken and a few loaves of bread, grabbed every gas can they had which was actually 12 and stocked up on everything we needed, and yes some additional weapons as well. More ball bats, some axes, hatchets and rope for in case shit happens and if it's needed scenario.

We've stocked up on plenty of medications from the pharmacy, not to mention we raided the liquor stores near the reservation San Carlos. We got lots of rubbing alcohol, hydrogen peroxide, q-tips and I mean lots of q-tips, cotton balls, Tylenol, aspirin, anti psychotic and anti depressant medications and a bunch of other shit.

In the electronics department, I managed to activate us a couple of Sprint and T-Mobile cell phones, let's face it, AT&T royally sucks balls and I don't care what they previously showed on commercials on TV. The sucked before the zombies and they suck even worse after the apocalypse. We got ourselves a couple bluetooh headsets, wired headsets, a CB radio. The cell phones all have 7 years posted in them with unlimited talk, text and web. And boy can I ever tell you an iPhone unlocked and jail broken and placed on another network is fuckin' awesome! Too bad before the world turned the shit the iPhone was stuck on a shitty network that didn't deserve it.

Enough of that shit though, we've managed to make our way to the rooftop of Wally World and will be staying the night here with the entrance to the rooftop boarded off. A couple tents, sleeping bags and cans of sterno are keeping us up here. Decided to camp out up here with our still fresh milk, kinda freshly cooked chicken made ourselves earlier.

We're able to see a lot more up here. On hindsight, we should've thought to get some gauze and other bandages, never know. So far it's been fun, we've been having fun with our iPhones. Was a pain in the royal ass to get them activated at Wal-Mart considering it needed iTunes, but we managed it, found greendot cards there at walmart and activated those with 17 million dollars on it. Using this buy any apps we want or need. Seems fun enough.

Plus if everything goes back to non shit, I'll be one rich mother fucker.

The Initial Escape

2010-03-18T17:39:00.000-07:00

We already had our bags packed last night and made them quite heavy with the canned food and of course the can opener and silverwear we needed to bring. Since we weren't able to find anything else to use for a weapon, we utilized our backbacks, they were durable enough thankfully.

We waited inside, waiting, watching carefully through the window until we had the sparsest amount of zombies we could visibly see. Our hearts were racing and I was scared shitless, I was certain I was going to die, but if I stayed inside, I would've died as either way. I had my backpack at the ready to use like a mace or morning star or whatever you want to call it, and boy was I glad. The moment Paul opened the door, in rushed one of these undead fuckers. I bashed it in the head as hard as I could which was hard enough, the zombie was apparently knocked out cold... thank the blessed stars.

I glanced around outside from inside the door and ran towards the car, backpack in hand and haphazardly posted on my back using only one of the straps so I could easily and readily use it again if needed. I ran to the truck, picked up the keys and luckily the door of the truck was unlocked. Another stroke of luck. I climbed in the best I could, which wasn't an easy feat with the truck being so far up and me being a chubby guy at that, but I got on and shut the door, same as Paul on the other side. As soon as the door was shut, I heard a slam against the door.

I placed the key into the keyhole and started the truck. We strapped our seatbelts and pulled away, avoiding the cars on the road that have crashed into each other and pushing the smaller cars away and practically running over them. We decided against trying to raid the grocery stores and pharmacy until we got to a smaller town, so first stop, Globe, Arizona.

We are still driving and utilizing my cell phone for an internet connection. Seems to be working relatively well. When we get to Globe, we're going to find what we can. That area would indeed be the safest place to raid at this moment as it's a hell of a lot smaller than Prescott and Chino Valley.

Luckily enough our truck here has 3 quarters of a tank of gas, so we should be fine for the time being and should make it a good ways until we find a safe resting spot to refill our tank and find gas cans.

Not everything's going according to plan, but it seems like a good deal to me, I'm still alive, Paul's still alive, we're doing fine.

Anyone still alive in Globe, Arizona? Please comment. I'd like to know if it's still alright there or if you need help. We can carry you in the back of the truck and could use an additional set of hands.

It Still Continues

2010-03-17T15:15:00.000-07:00

There seems to still be people out and about amongst the living dead, but it seems they're more into survivor mode than let's be stupid and go to McDonalds mode. I'm seeing the mistakes I probably would've made by watching these suckers get killed. I already saw one individual get eaten alive by a group of the zombie horde attempting to take my ideal truck. At least it seems he had the keys to the truck which are laying on the ground, that'll help out the my venture later. I'm waiting till tomorrow. We're going to finish packing our backpacks tonight and head straight into the buttcrack of dawn to pick that truck and raid the stores.

It seems to be clearing of the undead a bit, they must be sparsing themselves out. I wonder if they've actually got any intelligence. The zombies that is.

The Chaos, The Horror, The ... Stupidity

2010-03-16T12:53:00.000-07:00

I figured the chaos would've died down by now. It's 12:37 PM right now and there's still a bunch of people being fucking stupid. It's like these idiots sleep at night comfortably in their homes, then during the day it's like they're saying to each other, "Hey, let's go outside and have a nice, looooooooong walk. What could possibly go wrong?" I can understand the need for food and all, but right now is the kind of time where you starve yourself for a few days if you don't have any food.

Already had quite a few vehicular accidents just right outside and some dumb shit ran his van into the Panda Express. The stores are closed apparently, which is the wisest thing employer could've done for their workers. Or if the employer told them to come to work anyway, his employees are worth gold because they're smart enough to stay the fuck out of the shit outside. That is unless the dumbass in the van worked at the Panda Express. I find that kinda funny really.

People are still outside. Have one gal beating on my door screaming for someone to open, as if that'll ever happen. Sorry dumb bitch, I'm not opening my door for you nor anyone. I'm not running the risk of having any of those fucking undead in my home. When I leave at the right opportunity for raids and hauling ass, then they'll be more than welcome in my place, but until then FUCK OFF!

Paul and I got a little sleep last night, just not a lot. Very difficult to sleep when zombies are outside at all hours of the day or night. Between the two of us, we've learned they reanimate, are tireless and watched their eating habits on the neighbor idiots. They seem to attack and eat the brains and intestines first, then start on the flesh. Soft tissue first it seems. Maybe it's like pudding to them or eating dessert first then your main course. I don't know, but it's what they do.

It's damn freaky though. No matter what you do to these things I bet they'll just keep coming back at you. Could probably dismember them and cut every limb off and chop them into the tiny pieces, they'd probably still come for you. In this case we've decided the best way to get rid of them is to burn them until there's nothing left. That just takes too long unfortunately.

We both think it's best if we survive the vehicular raid to hold off on the store raid until we get to Globe or Miami, Arizona. The two towns are relatively small, especially with Miami being a ghost town in more ways than one now. Will be easier to defend ourselves and uphold our stronghold. Plus there's several places there we can stop at, they should at least have a grocery store to raid in one of the two towns and should be a health clinic to raid for medical supplies.

The raid for food and medicines and stuff will be a lot safe in a dead town or two with the least amount of living population before the zombie outbreak. We're just waiting for the best time. Honestly I'm scared shitless, but that big ass truck is still there. Great for just running these fuckers over without endangering ourselves, plus some really thick tires. I want that truck. It's likely a gas guzzler but I'm not paying for gas, what the fuck do I care?

I'm going to get to packing my backpack here in a couple moments. Got to carry a few can goods, 2 forks, 2 spoons, some undies and socks and another shirt. Oh, can't forget the cigarettes.

It's a little frightning to smoke here actually. Light up one cigarette or spray some air freshener and it seems to draw them towards you unless the smoke is blown into a vent. We've found if we smoke in the bathroom with the vent on and blow the cigarette smoke in the vent, this occurrence happens far less. Will be a lot better when we're in that truck!

The Start of it All

2010-03-15T22:27:00.000-07:00

I noticed a lot of strange things going on outside lately, it's been all over the news plastered on every channel. Can't even change the channel on TV without hearing about it. Everyone's being urged to stay inside and lock the door. My name is Mark Holinstein, I'm 24 years old, 350 pound chubby bastard. I stay with an older guy, a great friend of mine helping me get my life in order. His name is Paul ... something, I don't remember his last name off the top of my head.

I'm writing this blog because I want to reveal the truth as to what's going on. Everyone's saying it's just people going crazy, a string of gangs violently attacking passers by and breaking into homes killing everyone. I know exactly what's going on, I know these people aren't just violent gangs killing people. They have no organization to their killings, they don't even act intelligent. They're the living fucking dead.

How in the sam hell these blantant idiots don't see these things as things ... and by things I mean the living dead is beyond us.

This blog is being written on Google's Blogger because I know of Google's reputation being the internet supergiant and all. I'm a computer technician and programmer. If there's anyone else left alive reading this blog, I hope you're doing well. If this shit hasn't effected you yet, prepare yourself.

I've played the Resident Evil video games, but unfortunately the video games, the movies, all that, just a total crock of shit. I don't think you can really kill these things. I've watched out my window as my neighbor was mutilated by a small group of zombies. He had beaten one in the head with an aluminum baseball bat crushing the bastards cranium. Totally destroyed and flattened the skull, no way in fucking hell that couldn't have been killed if like in the movies and video games. I watched what looked like a dead zombie lay while the others finished taking my neighbor down and killing him. Looked back through the window a couple hours later and witnessed the crushed skulled zombie get back up.... They reanimate.

Right now I'm where I stay with my friend in Prescott, Arizona near historic downtown near the courthouse square. There's a Springhills Mariot across the street, an Albertsons, Walgreens, Staples, a Panda Express and a few other stores. Its a relatively small town. I stay in the Sheldon Street Lodge. The place is rock walled on the ouside, front door made of solid wood and pretty fucking sturdy. I'm primarily extremely thankful the windows aren't low enough to the ground for anyone to climb through easily and the living dead are too damn stupid to attempt to it seems, either that or smart enough. I hear of other people's homes getting broken into through the windows.... perhaps they're not too stupid.

At this moment it's 10:44 PM and can't seem to sleep. A little bothered by it all still, Paul's still awake as well. I have a plan and Paul agrees with me on it. There's cars and trucks outside and we're assuming that not everyone is going to be able to make it to their vehicle. Especially this nice sized truck with these huge fucking tires out there.

We're going to wait it out here inside. We have plenty of canned goods we've gotten from food banks and other charities like Open Door, Church on the Street, Yavapai Food Bank and the list goes on. Don't really like the beans but we have plenty to eat while we're here. Luckily enough the power and water seem to still be running and working just fine, cable TV still works, but for how long?

Still a little bothersome with the fact that these fucking zombies reanimate. How do you kill something that just comes back even without the top of it's gruesome, ugly head? I'd assume taking a high powered shotgun or rifle and blowing their heads off or chopping them off, but unfortunately I'm afraid I'd see them pop back up. At least they stay down for a couple hours, so we at least know we can knock them out.

We want to wait and horde ourselves in here until the chaos finishes outside. I'm going to go outside when there's as few zombies right outside as possible. Need to be very careful because I can't see around the corners and inside the corridor like areas where our front doors are around this place. Plus these mother fuckers run fast. Being dead I guess you wouldn't get tired as they certainly don't seem to. I need to raid the vehicles to see if I can get one of them working.

From there we'll attempt to raid the Walgreens pharmacy for antibiotics, pain killers and anything we can. Plus any fresh foods, especially milk. I know fully well if this is indeed the end of the world that the milk there may be the last fresh milk any human ever drinks ever again. Stock up on some perishables that we will enjoy for the last time in our now horrible lives and as much medicines and non parishables as we can.

From there we'll attempt to raid Wal-Mart for cell phones. I believe I can hack enough to obtain years of unlimited talk and data usage on these things. I'll have my laptop with me, so I'll be able to keep anyone who might be still alive and looking for any ray of hope. If you're reading this, keep up with me. If I'm in your town, please, let me know. Dear god I hope I Hope I HOPE there's someone still out there alive and well.

Our final step is to obtain gas cans and fill them with gas as best as possible without any attack on us, like that's going to happen. Us, not getting attacked? Dear god just look out your windows and look at those things. Gas cans filled with gas, motor oil and transmission fluid. I also pray we don't get a flat tire or I can definitely see us being royally fucked then, especially out here in Arizona where it's the middle of fucking nowhere.

If you're still alive and reading this blog or watching any of my video's on youtube. Please, leave me a comment. Let me know you're still alive. Please.